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Attracting Women – Avoid These Mistakes, By John Lassy

Attracting Women – Avoid These Mistakes, By John Lassy

Needing That Outcome To Attract a Woman

You may have heard this before but it’s such a huge sticking point. During the interaction, needing that outcome, that response, that end result. The overwhelming desire to make it work and for things to go perfectly. This stiffens up the interaction and causes you to take on a wooden like demeanour. Think of trying too carefully to carry a full cup of tea and not spill it. Trying so hard makes you spill it…how to attract a girl

You should be aware when you are in this outcome dependence state during the interaction and you find yourself analysing her a little too deeply, you are probably going backwards. In return, she picks up on this hesitation and what ultimately gets communicated to her is that you are trying really hard to make this work. You lose value and lower your chances of attracting her.


You need to keep an important point in mind when attracting women. We humans always strive towards the perceived higher value person and generally the least reactive person in an interaction would be the one who holds this value. If you are looking for outcome with her and this causes you to react, you become less valuable.

Self-Doubt Will Kill You In Attracting Women

Ever been in an interaction with a girl and all of a sudden you start to doubt yourself and feel that you aren’t good enough? This is another huge sticking point for many men. Again this lowers your value and destroys attraction as your insecurities seep through. Think about this… If you were the real deal, high value and filled with genuine emotions of esteem and self-worth, you knew without a shadow of doubt that her life would be enriched with you in it, would you fear a negative outcome?

meeting and attracting girls

Too much Energy to Attract Women

This is to do with calibration and can only be uncovered through lots of field experience. Going in too hard to early and then losing momentum. In other words the vibe just dies. You see, you have great-approach-game but you let it all unleash too quickly. In other words you go in with major fire power and guns fill blazing, but then experience burn out. It just dies. So what’s the solution? Calibration is key. You need a good balance of energy that can be worked up as things progress. I guess this behaviour would occur from the mindset of ‘let her also work for you.’ Being slightly mysterious and making her have to figure you out, to push YOUR buttons.

Common Threads against Attracting Women

Can you see the common thread with the above three points? They all go back to value. In order to create and sustain attractiveness you must demonstrate genuine and persistent value. This value begins with your internal emotions and ultimately gets communicated through your behaviours. But it’s all linked! A good balance between self-development and live field experience is the perfect way to grow your game and become truly amazing at cold approaching and picking up women.

Get Some Experience Meeting Women

Day/Night whatever… Just get out there and do it. If you are just starting out I would suggest a ratio of 70% field experience and 30% personal development (including learning about dating-such as this article). As you skills improve I would tend to work more on yourself while still been out there. A good ratio of 50% infield and 50% personal development.

FREE Dating Newsletter

By the way, ‘Day Game Dating’ runs a FREE newsletter that goes even further into the topics of effective dating and includes real life stories of men who have been out in the field meeting women. We even answer questions posed and help with certain sticking points. Again you can have access to it all, and it’s free!

If you have not yet joined up then I would urge you to do so. All you need is an email address which we promise to NEVER share with anyone. Oh, and anytime you decide that you have figured this stuff out and you don’t need our help anymore – You can simply unsubscribe. It just takes a click.

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Of course we also hold regular dating workshops and bootcamps and offer a full range of private coaching options. This can all be found on the website.


John Lassy

Day Game Dating

Day Game Dating

Dating Coaching at Day Game Dating
Colin offers professional dating coaching for single men Australia wide. Since 2008 Colin has helped hundreds of clients to meet their ideal partners and settle down. To begin working with Colin, simply book in a free 20 minute consultation.
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